Florida

Thank you for teaching me

that the best part of living,

of pushing through trials and errors

and breaking down barriers,

of having valleys and mountains

and moments of pure laughter,

 

the best part of living through blissful days

after rainy days

and the sleepless nights and the beach sunrises,

or the starlit drives

and the evenings of family dinners

with the hard goodbyes,

 

the best part about all of this

is I get to keep all of myself

and all of you.

How to be Your Own Person

Maybe you cleaned up your toys and brushed your teeth,

You put on your jammies, ready for sleep,

And crawled into bed, waiting for mom

To come to your room and sing you a song

To go to sleep.

 

Her singing is sad and she almost cries

And that scares you, so you too rub your eyes,

Because now it is so that something is wrong

And you wonder how you two will now move along

In your sleep.

 

But she takes your fingers away from your eye,

She says, “Honey,” and breathes a deep, hopeful sigh,

“Mommy is sad, but you don’t have to be.

You are your own person and that’s the way it should be.”

 

“Mommy is sad, but that’s just for today,

Tomorrow we’ll wake with a bright, new day.

And how are you feeling? Weren’t you happy before?

Yes! That’s okay. You can be happy more.”

 

“I believe in you for all that you are,

I don’t want to stop you, it won’t get that far.

You are allowed to think what you do.

It will never upset me, in spite of my mood.”

 

“So now, close your eyes and drift off to sleep,

Dream your sweet thoughts which are oh so unique.

Know that it’s okay to feel the way you do,

Because no matter what, I will always love you.”

-December 2015

Healing

And when I was sitting at a dinner table

surrounded with family,

and we were holding our sides

we were laughing so hard,

and it was eyes closed and smiling

and leaning over the edge of our seats laughing,

it was then that I knew.

 

I was finally happy.

I was finally new.

-July 2017

String Lights

I’d like to memorize this moment–

how they all were woven together

beneath the twinkling stars.

Their shiny black hair reflected the setting sun,

and their smiles were happy,

springing from deep within– so much contentment,

 

and so much underlying it.

I can recall the red dress I was wearing,

and the weight I was carrying to be reminded

that I had to leave them in the morning.

 

But I didn’t need to sulk in that sadness.

I only needed to memorize the moment,

to preserve the more important feeling of

how they each reminded me of what mattered:

I had to get on that plane tomorrow

and finish what I needed to do,

and come back home to them

for the next time, indefinitely true.

 

There is purpose to these moments we know

we’ll look back on. When we’re living in them,

thinking, I’m going to miss this.

I’m going to remember this.

These are the defining moments

that highlight our meaning,

our life course, and our purpose.

 

There is so much more to care about beyond ourselves,

more than what is contained within our skin.

These moments tell us what it is.

-October 2017